Pain Healer

As a Dom I'm very demanding in areas such as obedience, discipline, self-development and service. It takes a lot of time and mental effort to train a submissive, even if the relationship is purely online, and in return I expect a sub to work as hard as possible at the tasks I set. In order to achieve this level of dedication to service, a submissive needs to be healthy, both mentally and physically. The sad truth is that this is getting ever harder to achieve. I read some statistics recently that if you include obesity and mental health issues, around 60% of Americans have a chronic illness of some sort. The UK is not far behind. The most depressing statistic is that children are almost as badly off for illnesses as adults, with diseases such as autism increasing exponentially. I first became aware of the seriousness of this issue over a year ago when my local medical centre ran a public meeting, and at that meeting their presentation showed that 30% of their pat...

If you've ever done the physics experiment where you magnetize a nail by stroking it with a bar magnet, you will have an idea of the power of alignment. The nail is made up of many regions called domains which are magnetic, but randomly oriented, so the magnetic effect cancels out. When you stroke the nail with a magnet, you cause the domains to become aligned, with the result that the nail now generates a magnetic field. The same can be true of people. A group of people working together who are not aligned will tend to cancel out each others' efforts, and produce very little useful result. If that same group of people can be aligned in a common direction much more can be achieved. If you have ever worked in a team which is out of alignment you will know the sheer frustration and hopelessness that results. By contrast, working with a group of people who are in the flow, like a group of jazz musicians improvising together, can be a joyous and creative experience. As an individu...

There are plenty of people who would like to see themselves as dominant, but finding someone who is good at it could be difficult, as people with the right qualities are rare. Submitting to a dominant is a major decision and one which needs to be taken with care. Someone new to submission can easily be swept along by the new discoveries, feeling accepted and being understood. However this can lead you into a relationship with the wrong person, which can be an unpleasant experience. There's no one-size-fits-all prescription here - you need to find a dominant that meets your needs, as well as you being the right person for the dominant. The list below contains my suggestions for things you might want to look out for, but you should take what feels important and add your own criteria too. In what follows I will be referring to a female submissive and male dominant, but most of the points are relevant whatever the genders involved. Qualities desirable in a dominant: He will have a hi...

As with any other skill, submissiveness is developed by training. Even those who have a naturally submissive personality can have this improved by experiencing an appropriately demanding training regime. It's very hard to be sufficiently strict with oneself to achieve the necessary development of personality. Therefore, although I've been discussing submitting to Gaia as a goal, in order to achieve this we first of all have to begin by submitting to an actual physical human, a dominant. In this and other posts I will describe the dominant as male, but this is not necessarily the case. Whatever gender, the dominant needs to have an understanding of what you are aiming to achieve, and to have the humility to recognise that serving them is just a step along the path for you, and that eventually they will need to surrender their dominance of you to a higher power. This is a big ask, because training a submissive represents a big commitment in time for the dominant, and he wil...

The following are my views on the qualities that make a good submissive. This may seem like an extensive list, but it is not something which has to be achieved all at once. It is a set of aspirations which submissive training can support you in achieving, although the effort required to achieve them will be yours. If you are not inspired by the thought of achieving many of these qualities then you are probably not seeking to become a submissive. Obedience - a fundamental requirement but not easy to achieve. A dominant's demands are designed to stretch you, to make you transcend your limitations. Obeying will take you outside of your comfort zone over and over again, into a state of surrender. One you place yourself in service to Gaia the tests to your obedience do not become any less, it it just that knowing what is required of you is not so obvious and requires intuition. Discipline - a submissive is both self-disciplined and accepting of external discipline. Discipline ta...

To recap on some recent posts I've made, I'm talking about our planet, which I'm calling Gaia, as an intelligent, living being that provides us with everything we need to exist. If you can accept this, then it seems obvious to me that submissiveness is the only appropriate attitude to adopt towards her. Certainly the arrogance with which mankind has treated her can no longer be sustained; it will lead to our extinction. Therefore I conclude that submissiveness is an excellent grounding for the way we should behave towards our planet. Once we start to make this shift, it seems that the Gaia responds, and we start to gain access to our higher consciousness. However, turning a desire for submission into it's practical reality is not a simple task - for most of us our conditioning pulls us in the opposite direction. It therefore takes training to reorient the personality away from ego-based selfishness towards humility and service. It's hard to keep up the will to ...

This is a phrase that I hear more often than I would expect, given that the people I mix with don't tend to spend a lot of time discussing the gospels. It tends to make me prick my ears up, as if I'm being alerted to something important. I'll let others debate whether the phrase has the same meaning as "blessed are the submissives", but that's how I'm choosing to interpret it. People with submissive qualities often get a raw deal in our society. In a culture that values independence and being extrovert, submissiveness is often mistaken for weakness and subservience. I see it differently - submission requires strength, self-discipline and determination. Submissive individuals are excellent followers and provide loyal support to leaders they believe in. They value good relationships, honesty and plain speaking. They work hard and take pride in producing good work. They do not look for power, celebrity status or applause - they are happy in supporting role...

In this new series of posts I'm looking at how dominance and submission might be used in service. In particular I've been talking about how we might serve “the planet”, but I find that description is a bit too abstract and impersonal for my purpose. As I've said already, we need to stop seeing our planet as an inanimate object, and begin to regard it as an intelligent, living being, the source of all life that supports and nourishes us. Doesn't this being have a name? I'm inclined to steer clear of names that are too strongly associated with religions, such as God, Brahman, Yaweh, and suchlike. They have too much history invested in them, they carry too much baggage, and the fact that we're familiar with them tends to make us believe that we know what they mean. I'm also cautious about names that appear to refer to the universe as a whole. These days I hear many people talking about getting a message from "The Universe" or "The Field...