What makes a good submissive?

The following are my views on the qualities that make a good submissive. This may seem like an extensive list, but it is not something which has to be achieved all at once. It is a set of aspirations which submissive training can support you in achieving, although the effort required to achieve them will be yours. If you are not inspired by the thought of achieving many of these qualities then you are probably not seeking to become a submissive.

Obedience - a fundamental requirement but not easy to achieve. A dominant's demands are designed to stretch you, to make you transcend your limitations. Obeying will take you outside of your comfort zone over and over again, into a state of surrender. One you place yourself in service to Gaia the tests to your obedience do not become any less, it it just that knowing what is required of you is not so obvious and requires intuition.

Discipline - a submissive is both self-disciplined and accepting of external discipline. Discipline takes many forms, from the mild to the severe depending on the need. Punishments include, but are not limited to, physical correction that causes pain. This may seem shocking to some, and tends to get confused with abuse. The difference is that submission is voluntary, and consent can be withdrawn at any time if discipline tips over into abuse. Pain is an unavoidable part of being human, but instead of numbing it with drugs, submissives learn to use it to increase their consciousness, improve their relationships, and purify the Field around them.

Honesty – the idea of lying to or withholding information from your dominant or a fellow submissive should be unthinkable. If you take your desire to serve and submit seriously you should also avoid any type of occupation where dishonesty or deception may be required. This is easier said that done, in a world which is more and more built on falsehood and denial of the truth.

Openness – a submissive strives to be open with her body, feelings and her mind. She holds no secrets from her dominant, her community, her fellow submissives. When giving feedback to others she strives to be honest but not hurtful. She is open and truthful about her emotions, but does not inflict them on others. She accepts monitoring of her actions, activities and behaviour.

Reliability - a leader must be able to put complete trust in his submissive and to depend on her totally. Knowing thoroughly her strengths and weaknesses, capabilities and talents, he knows that if he sets her a task it will be carried out, however much difficulty and discomfort she may have to overcome. In order to be reliable she will have to develop other qualities - courage, resourcefulness, self-control, determination, punctuality, patience, and many others.

Good-natured - a submissive's aim is always to make others feel good, through qualities such as gentleness, compassion, respect, consideration and thoughtfulness towards others. However she will not allow her good nature to be taken advantage of in ways which would be detrimental to her dominant. Being obedient to him, she knows how to gently refuse others without giving offence. She can deal constructively with negative emotions. She can experience anger without subjecting others to it – she knows that it is her problem to deal with and no-one else’s. If she experiences fear she either overcomes it herself or enlists others to help her deal with it. Other words that describe a submissive include: positive, good-natured, non-critical, judgemental, even tempered, emotionally controlled, good listener.

Willpower and effort - a submissive will apply all her effort to a task, be resourceful in overcoming obstacles, with the aim of producing results not excuses. However she learns to work in a skilful way which is variously called "going with the flow", "effortless effort" or in Chinese "Wu Wei". In this way doing tasks, however mundane, are no longer stressful or feel like hard work, but become graceful and enjoyable. She knows when to rest from a piece of work when her concentration is flagging, but because she has resolved her inner conflicts her productivity is phenomenal.

Skills - a submissive is constantly striving to improve herself so that she may better fulfil her dominant's wishes. She treats her skills and abilities as a way to serve more effectively, and is not driven by praise, recognition or the need for success. She may not know what will be required next, so she motivates herself to acquire any skill she can in case it turns out to be valuable.

Simplicity - simplifying your lifestyle is not only good practice in submissiveness, it is also good for the planet and a good preparation for the adaptations we will all have to make to reduce our environmental impact. And from a submissive perspective an extravagant lifestyle is inappropriate - you cannot embrace submissiveness while driving round in an expensive car, taking extravagant holidays, making frequent flights for personal pleasure, employing a maid or spending quantities of money on clothes or gadgetry.

Resilience - this includes qualities such as fitness, tolerance of pain and discomfort, emotional strength, fearlessness and courage.



These are all subjects I hope to expand on as I continue to develop this blog.